Journal Question #5 What is Your Achilles Heal?

Know your weaknesses. Mine is being impulsive and my impulsive nature, which I love, because it is so much fun, yet has assisted me in making some very poor relatinship decisions over the years. So think about how you delude yourself (at times) into believing things about the relationship that are simply untrue or not really the way you envisioned. Start being more logical and think with your head instead of just going along with someone else's agenda. Journal, Journal, Journal! for it is the only way you can physcially see what is really there in the relationship, and hence, what is not there as well.

Journal Question #4 Are You Too Trusting of Him?

Instead of blindly falling for everything he says, use your brain to think about the consequences of the choices you are making, i.e. moving in with him.  Is it really good for you?  Is he really good for you?  Give yourself a reality check especially in the beginning when you are blinded by his everything.

Journal Question #3 What is his Family of Origin like?

What kind of relationship did he have with mother, father and siblings when growing up? What kind of relationship does he have with them today? Is he a middle child? Was he considered the “black sheep” of the family even though as an adult he is super successful? Observe how the family communicates with each other. This is very important for your future with your new partner because it will be an indication of how he will communicate (or not) with you. Writing in your journal will help you see communication patterns more clearly.

Journal Question #2 Ask Him What He Is Looking For

When you have a clear vision of what you need and want in a relationship, get him involved. See if he will articulate what is important to him in a relationship. Find out what he wants from the relationship. Really listen to his answers. Thank him for sharing with you and write down his response for future reference to help yourself become more clear if this man is good for you. Too often women try to fit in with the man and there is a danger of losing our individuality. The key is to proceed with caution and go slow in the beginning but we all know how difficult this is when we are in the infatuation period of a new relationship. But TRY! And remember to include your feelings when you journal.

Relationship Journal Question #1 Define Your Wants & Needs

Define what you want and need in a relationship. What is important to you and you alone? Make your list. As time goes on in the relationship, go back to the list and reflect on how you feel about your list. Ask yourself if you are being realistic about what you want and need and remember no one person is supposed to meet all of your needs, but there will be certain things important to you in a relationship, that if not met will simply not feel satisfying to you...for instance, if you value talking about everything and the other doesn't this could produce problems as time goes on. Evaluate if you can live this way long-term. Face the reality of your situation.

Keep A Relationship Journal

It's fun and easy to keep track of how your relationship is doing with a journal. In the following posts, I will have a question each day for you to ponder about the reality of your current relationship to see if it meets your needs. If there are questions I miss, just let me know and they will be added!